Time has passed and while every day brings a new trial, I am able to move on towards something better. That doesn’t necessarily mean move on to another person. I am not looking for someone else right now. I am still finding myself and focusing on my family. They are my main concern right now. There are difficult times ahead of us. And I may lose my mind momentarily and wish that their father was there to help. But I will quickly regain consciousness and realize that things are better and that he shouldn’t be there to help me watch the kids because I want to take a shower or catch a quick nap. I’ll be a dirty and exhausted woman before that happens.
I’ve learned that I am a strong woman, stronger than I thought. So, while I juggle myself, kids, household and grad school I think about how much better things are going to be for us. I am not just doing this for them, but for myself too.
And if you are experiencing the same thing, when you realize this, you can’t help but let go and move on. Don’t hang on to the negative crap and wonder why you? Why not you? Let it go. Who wants to hang on to old crap anyway? And if you really think about it as if it is rotting old crap, not the fresh hot stuff, but the stuff left out that no one would get rid of, do you really want it? I don’t. Crap stinks; phew…
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